fascinating_she

Last night I went to a party down near where Scott used to live. The house was nice, the people were awesome, and the cat was named Snatch. This is a family with a child. The child chose the cat, the dad chose the name. That was me once, but my dad chose the name Guabi Guabi. This dad chose the name Snatch. So the child calls the cat "Come here, Snatch!" and "I love Snatch!" etc. My mother would not have allowed such a naming, but it makes for a funny story.

The hostess of this party writes for a newsletter for moms. The June issue is about sex and marriage, and she'll be writing about the party. She asked if she can include my name and e-mail address, and then explained that there will be 400 moms reading this newsletter in June. Hooray!

There was a lull in business over December and the first half of January, but now the parties are flowing again. I had a party last Friday night which took 5 hours! By the end, I was thoroughly exhausted, but it was really fun. It was the probably the least structured party I've run, though it started out structured just as they all do. People kept arriving slowly, and some came as much as two hours after the party started. I did a lot of answering questions and chatting about specific items, and there were good sales. The hosts bought the largest chunk of stuff, but it was because of the other sales that they got their $50 worth of free stuff. And one of them is a basketball player and interested in being a practice client for me. That's pretty exciting because he has a very different body type than any I've worked on so far.

The host who called me originally said that he had first tried looking at Slumber Parties and Passion Parties and that neither of them allows men at the parties. Considering that he and his husband are both men, that clearly would not work for them. It's good for me because that meant I got their business, but I think it's silly of the other companies to make that rule. I think that should be up to the host of the party.

I've another party tonight. Whee!

When I get back from the ocean, I'm ordering this. I'll let you know what I think.

It drives me mildly batshit when people get their billing addresses wrong. You really should be aware of your credit card billing address, people.

I have three parties booked this week. Three. One tonight (yes, Wednesday night- so Scormus some people do have Fascinations parties on off nights, though it's rare for sure), one Friday night (which is Mandi's, and will undoubtedly be fun), and one Saturday night. I'm happy about all of the parties because with three in a week it's likely that I'll make some decent money at least at one of them, and they are almost always fun, but that's a lot of nights that I can't be doing laundry, y'know? I think I might cave and pay a laundromat to do my laundry for me this time. Is it really that much more expensive than paying to do my laundry in the machines?

I'm thinking of doing a prep for holidays party (with the dressing like an elf or something) on December 8th or 9th (Friday or Saturday). If you want to attend, let me know if either (or both) of those dates works for you.

P.S. celebrian_3, if you come down for the party you can crash at my place instead of driving back up at night. I might even buy breakfast foods if someone else was going to be around to be fed.

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Brutal Troll You Feast On: Bananas You Lurk Around In: The Hearts of Men

Go see Shortbus. Here's KDD's review of said film.

Last night's party was a hoot. It was a bridal shower, but the bride and all of the guests were older women, not the 20s crowd usually at bridal showers. There was one woman who sat on the couch scowling the whole time, and apparently said to the woman next to her "I'm not having fun. I don't buy this stuff for myself and I also don't buy it for anyone else." It was also reported to me that this woman thought I was a man. "That's a man presenting. Look, every time he turns to the side you can see the bulge of a penis." Yes, that's right, I have a bulging cock. Haven't I told you all that I'm a man? Oops, sorry to have left out that bit of information. I wonder what my gynecologist will say when I tell her. Anyway, everyone else was laughing and carrying on, having a blast. There was a woman from the Philippines who didn't know any of the slang terms, and would say "O-oh!" and blush slightly each time I explained one. She was awesome, laughing and asking questions a lot, and very interested in it all. The group named the double-ended dong we use for Musical Dong; Freddie is his new name. Hahaha! I was very amused at the naming. Throughout the party, every once in a while, someone would say something about Freddie. A very good-natured group. The bride is interested in becoming a rep, which is cool. She will be in Ohio with her new husband for four months, though, so it won't be soon that she signs up.

Anyway, I was very annoyed with the disappearing rep for dropping off the face of the planet so that I had very short notice for this party, but I am very glad I ended up there. Sales were okay, and it was a great time. I met some really interesting people, which is one of my two favorite things about this gig, the other being that I seem to teach at least one person one thing at each party. :)

Oh, and last weekend's party raised just over $300 in sales (which, btw, is approx. $100 in commission - yay!), so the hostess gets $50 worth of free stuff! YAY! I love free stuff, so it pleases me tremendously that this girl gets some. She's really nice, too, and not wealthy, so that just makes it even better.

Filth dissemination. Have I ever told you that "filth" is my favorite word? Not because of its meaning, but just because of the way it sounds, and how fun it is to say. It's the most cacophony you can fit into such a short word. Ffff i lth. Love it.

So the parties are going well. No big stories, but I did learn at one that when you put a lit flashlight up flush with a fake boob, the fake part glows while the rest doesn't. Now, these parties certainly don't involve this sort of activity often, and I left around this time, being a professional party rep and not a party guest. Still, it was something I did not previously know. Something they did not previously know was what ben wa balls are. So there was information exchange, hooray!

I had two parties this weekend, one Friday night and one last night. They were both way down south, but had very different feels to them. Friday night's was the party where I first tested Dirty Pictionary. It went over well, though the guests didn't know a surprising amount of the words. Some of the ones they *did* know and draw and guess correctly seemed more obscure and/or harder than those they passed. They gave me some more ideas, and I'm just going to make a bunch more cards to add including those suggestions.

On the way back from the party, I hit a huge bump and stuff got very jostled. Three of the toys now don't work right (two that had been fine are fully broken, and there's still the half-broken wabbit). So I'm going to replace the one (pulsating bath sponge) 'cause it's like $15 or $20 and I have a 20% off coupon for the store, and then there's a vibe I can buy on the rep re-order site for half price which I can use to replace the wabbit (it's not the same exact thing, but it's the same sort of thing, a vibe with a clit stimulator and separate motors/controls for each). Amusingly, one of the customers ordered one of the broken things, so it didn't detract much from the party. Hooray!


Despite the broken toys, the party last night went very well. The ladies all seemed to have a good time and I think each of them will order something. There were only 6 there, but if every one of them ordered something, that would make me happy.

There was a surreal moment last night when we found that I have probably run into one of the women at the party in the context of our day jobs. I'm not positive, but it's likely enough that it was sort of odd. Both jobs are the sort which require confidentiality, but for very different reasons. It was certainly a "Tucson" moment, with some extra existential surreality.

lunarcamel had the brilliant idea for Dirty Pictionary to play at parties. I'm all up on that stuff. So I'm making cards with stuff for the to have to draw, but I'd like suggestions. I want them to be not too easy to draw and not too hard to terribly hard (we do have a limited time to play games at the parties). Some on the list I have so far are "multiple orgasms", "sex toy cleaner", and "Kama Sutra". Please share any ideas you have. Thanks!

A customer's experience with silicone anal beads is that while the package says they are dishwasher safe, they are not, in fact, dishwasher safe. Hers cracked and shriveled up when she washed them in the dishwasher, which she did before ever using them (to get the new chemical plastic smell off of them). If you are going to buy silicone toys, it is safer to refrain from using the dishwasher to clean them. You're warned.

I don't think I ever actually posted about this here, but the lead rep in Tucson quit because she got a full time job and on top of the hojillion other things she does (mothering, wifing, nursing school) it was just too much. No one has heard from the other Tucson rep in months, so I'm it. The only Fascinations rep in Tucson. So you live in Tucson or any of the Benson, etc places south of here which have no reps, and you want a party? You get me. That's cool in that it means I should have a bunch more parties, but it means that people may not always get to have their parties when they want to, which might sometimes make them not happen at all if the date and time is inflexible for them. I hope that doesn't happen often; itd be unfortunate for everyone.

A woman called me today and wants to have a party every other month or so. That rocks, but the first one will have to be on a different day than she wanted it. I am going to encourage her to plan the next one with me soon after that one, 'cause even if she's a repeat customer, I can't bump other people for her.

I hope all of this means I'll start making more money through this soon. I have made some, but not very much yet. It'd be really great to plush up my tuition account, especially since I just bought books and will eventually need to buy a table.

I've got to come up with some more games. The recently-quit rep had one I really liked that I need to ask her about, but that's only one. I want to have a variety for the sake of myself, but also if I do have repeat customers, I don't want to be using all of the same games each time. That's just boring. Oh, I just got another idea. So whenever I find some free time (which is really going to be tough now that school has started), I'll work on creating that one. I'm sure there are some board games that are meant for parties, not lovers, and that are short enough play-time-wise that I could buy for my kit and play as part of the party. Hm.

Upon a suggestion from a friend, I have started a MySpace page under this name to try to drum up more business. I'm, um, networking. On MySpace. Blogosphere, bring me business. xoxo, F.S.

So the lead rep in Tucson quit doing the Fascinations thing. She's got two kids and a husband, is in nursing school, and when faced with day care bills for this school year she chose to get a full time job. With all that going on, she's just not got time for this stuff. That's very good for me, as the only other rep in Tucson has been doing this an even shorter time than I have, oh, and no one has been able to get in touch with her for quite some time. So for now, I'm it. I have three parties booked over two weekends in September, one in October, and one lasy who wants to reschedule (her party was originally scheduled to be tonight). That's much more than I had before, though it's not excessively regular. School begins September 5, which is in just over a week, and when that happens I will probably be glad to not have two parties to run every weekend (though the one weekend w/two parties is during school- so it goes & I can't complain too loudly because). I make my first tuition payment next week. I currently have in the tuition bank account enough money for the first payment and about 5/7 or so of the second. So that's not too bad, but it's not super great.

I bought Apple Works to use to make my business cards, but I find that it's a very clunky program and I may not be able to make nice business cards with it. I will read more tutorials and such and see, but I may end up having to try to use the university's computers to create them, put 'em on my jump drive, and then find somewhere to print them out, or some other scheme. The ones from the website are okay, but they're not the style I'd like to hand out to friends, people at bars, and leave in stacks at places like Halo.

One of the parties I have in September is for a gal who says that no straight men are invited because they feel that "straight men hinder the purchasing experience". She also says that she thinks it will be a high-yielding party, considering her group. So that's good. She's asked me for some order forms prior to the party because one of her friends "wants to spend a lot of money" but can't be at the party. I am trying not to be too hopeful, but this does sound promising.

There were not very many photos taken, and I am posting three. This is not a reference to the "Holy Trinity."

( Mandi is Queen of the Dong. )

( For dessert, we had cherry pie. )

( It's not a party until someone spills something. Right? Well, I hope not, actually, but anyway Oxyclean took the spilled red wine right out of the carpet. Sweet! )

The photos have been posted on flickr for approximately 15 minutes. The Queen of the Dong photo says it has 39 views, already. The other two have zero. I believe flickr is a might mistaken.

I recently purchased the pear berry scented version of the cream with the stupid name, and I strongly recommend sticking with the original scent. I bought the 8 ouncer, too, which will last for a long time (the stuff works really well; I don't need much. I shaved both legs, underarms, and bikini line tonight with about 2 quarter sized dollops.), so I will need to counterbalance the too-strong-too-sweet-vaguely-cough-syrupy scent with something else afterward. It smelled better in the bottle (I did smell it at the store before ordering some) than it did coating my legs. Oh, well. Next time, I'm going back to the original scent. And, you know, it works just as well and didn't cost any more, so all is not lost.

Other items purchased for reviewing: Tighten Up Shrink Cream (Craig asked if it causes cramp and I couldn't resolutely say no, having never tried it and having no reviews from friends or other reps to share), and Honey Dust. The boyfriend's out of town for a little while starting tomorrow, though, so you'll have to wait for those reviews. Well, I can tell you that the Honey Dust tastes great and comes from real honey, makes the wearer smell nice, and it's a subtle scent. The feather that comes with to apply it is lovely and I enjoy putting it on, but as for how he likes it, you'll have to wait.

Here you can donate to support a woman in Phoenix who is participating in the 3 day 60 mile breast cancer walk.

If you have American Express, they donate some amount if you use your card (I don't if it's a matching program or if they donate a blanket amount per donation on an AmEx card or what. I don't have an AmEx card.). Some employers offer donation-matching programs. Also, the donation is, of course, tax deductible. I donated a very small amount, because I can't afford to donate at all really, but it all adds up. So there ya go, my public service announcement of the day.